Lyrics : TOSGANO

It's very rare that I have to recommend a TOSGANO
What's a TOSGANO?
That's my little acronym
What's it stand for?
This one sucks, get a new one

You've got a dog, but the situation's hairy
And by that, I mean naughty
And it's getting pretty scary
It don't act like a pet, no
This is a TOSGANO
Let me spell it out for you
It's T-O-S-G-A-N-O

This one sucks, get a new one
It sucks, it sucks so friggin' much
It sucks so friggin' much
This one sucks, get a new one
I can't get rid of it fast enough
I can't get rid of it fast enough

You don't need a license to be a pet therapist, do you?
No, ma'am
So, under what circ*mstances would you recommend a TOSGANO?

Is it like, is it like if it pees wherever it pleases? (Eh)
Won't get a job and watches too much TV? (Uh-uh)
What if it gives you a dumb, blank stare? (Nope)
Or flashes his lipstick out of nowhere?
That does suck, but it's not enough
For a TOSGANO guarantee, an H-A-B is what you need