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SAVE MYSELF
por
Ryan Oakes
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I hang my head Locked inside of my bedroom, I'll be fine Right now, I'm saving my breath I'm sick of wasting my time This for all the times that I bled And all the pain that I felt I'll use the lies that I'm fed to f**kin' save myself Scared to pick that lock that's hiding my subconscious Way too young to be knowing all of these toxins Twelve years old, I was sippin' on concoctions Tryna tell the world that I think I'm all out of options Screaming out for help with the whole world watching It was entertaining, it fueled their gossip I was just a little kid when I flipped that faucet, went unconscious Like f**k it I'ma found out who God is No one ever found out about that day So they kept on giving me back pains They didn't care if I was stuck in a bad place It made my brain sicker than the Black Plague, now I'm having panic attacks when I'm alone and I don't sleep Fingers down my throat between the meals I wouldn't eat When I hit rock bottom, and I wanted to retreat I just crawled back up to my damn feet I hang my head Locked inside of my bedroom, I'll be fine Right now, I'm saving my breath I'm sick of wasting my time This for all the times that I bled And all the pain that I felt I'll use the lies that I'm fed to f**kin' save myself Bottled up inside, I never learned a way to grieve Can't blame myself, 'cause ever since I was a teen Everyone I found too close to me would leave I would hold on too long even when they'd cheat Happened three times, but the fourth girl was a treat She manipulated all my insecurities I would pull her weight for weeks while we wouldn't speak Held up her world while she would kick me in the knees I been thinking hard about that day When I told her it was our last day together She decided to take all of that pain And try to overdose, memory is a bad lane That I'ma never drive down, she don't deserve it, that's OD Permanent imprints from all of the anxieties Still burn my soul so bad it's a third-degree But I'm still not accepting defeat I hang my head Locked inside of my bedroom, I'll be fine Right now, I'm saving my breath I'm sick of wasting my time This for all the times that I bled And all the pain that I felt I'll use the lies that I'm fed to f**kin' save myself I won't break Break (I guess I'll save myself) I won't break Break (I guess I'll save myself)
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