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My name is Eggman and I'm the best
But my plans are always stopped by that blue pest!
They think I'm mad, but I'm quite keen!
If you don't believe me, try Mean Bean Machine!

My name is Sonic! I'm the Blue Blur!
I have running shoes and spiny cyan fur
I'm blazing fast, as you all know!
If you don't pick me in Brawl, then you're too slow!

My name is Miles, but "Tails" is what they call me!
I'm very little. I don't have any family...
I'm just an orphan... Will somebody adopt me?
'Cause I can spin my tails and fly real high
And build you new technology!

I'm called Knuckles. Yeah, that's my name
I don't know why I'm singing; this is lame...
I'm an еchidna. What else to say...?
I protect thе Chaos Emeralds. Now go away!

“Knuckles, that wasn't very musical!”
“Yes, my verse was far superior!”
“I don't like singing, okay?”
“Aw, c’mon, Knux!”
“Yeah, c’mon! Step it up!”
“Sounded a little flat, too-”
“I wasn't flat! Everyone leave me alone!”

Hello, I'm Amy! I'm Sonic's girl
And every time we hug- (-I wanna hurl!)
We'll have a family. Ten kids in all
And when we're wed- (-I hope I'm dead!)
-He'll be my baby doll!

“Everyone shut it! It's my verse again!”

My Death Egg will make you scream and shout!
It's got some dings... But I can buff those out!
Sky Chase, Launch Base... Any act is fine!
All your zones will soon be mine!

“Give it up, Eggman!”
“Yeah, your plans never work!”
“Well, how about this Eggbot? EEEEK, HE'S GOING BERSERK!”

Oh, Sonic dear... (-we're back to you?!)
I want you near... (-ON FIRE, TOO!)
Your emerald eyes (-is this over yet?)
And darling rear... (-ew!)
Please marry me, (-I'd rather not...)
Your bride to be, (-you're not that hot...)
Hedgehog and wife (-AAAGH!)
Eternally! (-Now just one sec!)

If we're a pair, I'm not aware!
(I have to change my underwear!)
So Amy Rose, please don't propose!
Hey, Sonic? I'm afraid I made a mess. Is this how you spell, "Sonic sez?"

My name is Eggman! Robotnik, too!
And I'm Sonic. I'm a streak of red and blue!
I'm Tails Prower!
I'm Amy Rose! This is Knuckles the Echidna-
Chaos Control!

I'm second player!
I'm evil and I'm greedy!
I'm in love with Sonic!
I'm known for being speedy-

We go together like frankfurters and chili!
(“... What?”)

So thanks for...
Playing on and staying true
'Cause Nintedon't what we all do!
For nineteen years of Spin Dashing
For hyping up Blast Processing!

For shuttle loops and home attacks
For pinball zones and Big the Cat!
For Blue Typhoon and Sonic Boom
For rings and things, thanks one and all to you
SEGA!

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