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would i find
por
David Shawty
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People wonder what’s going on in each other’s brains I wonder what you're doing a lot of the time There’s a feeling I don’t like that stays around a lot I wonder if I turn off the trail, would I find change? Would I find a bear trapped in a tent? Would I find a place I’ve already been? Would I find you sleeping beside a cyclops? Would I find something I wish wasn’t? If the roads dirty already Then what’s the point of cleaning up? My face looks dirty as it is You look just like you would whenever I’m staying out here on this trampoline The stars look prettier than ever The ground beneath me goes so deep into the ground It goes places that I’ll just probably never You ever reach that point of being Where you're scared and there’s no reason I even feel scared right now And I don’t know why but it's all easy Could be worse, probably not better I teach myself things sometimes, they're hard learned lessons There’s good things and there’s those bad ones There’s things that happen that don’t happen Mystery and bad reactions You're the one I still just think of You pop up even when it’s horrible You pop up even when it’s not your fault If I can repay you, I will gladly I do bad things and some evil Some things that I do, I think of But I don’t think much when i do it I do things that last forever They creep up over my shoulder They ask me if I need breakfast They’re like angels they’re like devils 'Cause they make me feel possessed Worried my teeth just might explode But they never do, I tell myself that And then the feeling just disposes I hear stories, I make stories up People tell me lots of things I make joy and I make horror up I look so horrible in the trees If you saw me, you’d be frightened But then you’d realize you're just like him We’re all human but we just hate each other And that’s okay, I’m not above it Look below and you’ll find heaven Look below and you’ll find hell Look below and you’ll find something Look above and you’ll start to yell Look above, that’s just as good Either way you look, you're looking And as long you keep looking Then you’ll be fine just like you should I wake up sometimes and hate it I wake up sometimes and love it If I could look at myself right now I’d be like damn, that’s really something The sticks around me making noise Like they’re alive and they’re excited The grass beneath me is invited For Halloween, we can be pirates Now and then I think of days That happened long ago And it makes me feel good and okay Sometimes it makes me wanna cry There’s happy bugs and scary guys There’s fairy tales, they can be true They can be dark and tell some lies But either way, they're just more words You can say words forever long They tell me story’s right and wrong And they have power they can hurt you Make you cry and make you sob The window pane is pretty nice You can look through it over and over It can see things but it’s quiet It doesn’t talk much, it’s just there I get off track and I stay on There’s no track unless you make one Sometimes I like to have it be Other times I just let it be In the night there’s lots of things The stars are great, there’s lots of them I get caught up in taking Percocets But I just take them 'cause life’s a struggle I try a lot of things i try I live my life and I live lies I live above and live below I’d rather die most of the time But your voice is rather soothing There’s lots of noise, it makes me curl up in a ball How can I live if there’s no point to it? Every game needs ending goal So I’m just suppose to keep on breathing Everyone just keeps on breathing Do any of you have a reason? I can't find one that has meaning But really I just might be projecting I lay around and I complain It doesn’t matter what they’re saying They’re all talking in that house I heard a noise and it should scare me But really I don’t even care If someone came right now to get me I’d probably lay there and just let 'em It’s cold out here but I got a blanket The air makes noise, it sounds like music And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried About things that aren’t even existent I’ve done some wrong, I’ve done some bad I've done some good, I’ve done some glad I hurt my ankle when I was little There's scary trees, they make some faces And there’s some noise, don’t know what is it I wonder if walk out into the darkness What I’ll find, will I remember? Would I find group a deer? Would I find a portal into somewhere I don’t like? Would I find another moment? Would I find something? We all find in time Would I find a f**king answer? Would I find some evil dancers by the haunted creek? Would I find someone to love? Would I find you in a hole that I have dug? Would I find myself entangled? In a berry bush with angels Is there heaven in that berry bush? Maybe that’s why I was in there Maybe I just shouldn’t live Or maybe I might live forever Maybe I could be the savior Or maybe I might be the cancer Is there’s horns on gods children? ?Am I evil? Am I gifted I hear howling in the distance Wild coyotes eating dinner Am I somewhere? Am I nowhere? Is there God or is there nothing? Is it wrong just to wonder? Obviously not but some might think so Now I lay down on this trampoline Where I write this prolonged message If wolves surround me and they eat me I already ate myself enough for all of them They can have the scraps if they want They can have the broken pieces There’s always gonna be another Sun That rises even when there isn’t If a group of demon babies Came and tried to do sacrifice Really what’s the point of sacrifice? We only have what we have for now Or maybe not maybe forever It gets so lonely in September It’s only August but my birthday's coming soon Another year away from never knowing I might live life and be annoying I bet people hate me want me hurting But really all of us are hurting Did I hurt you or did I spread the sickness? We’re all sick and we’re all evil There’s no good but there’s good people And if Satan helped me write this Maybe Satan lives inside you Maybe we’re all Satan sometimes I walk a thin line here and there You tell me I’m doing it wrong Maybe we’re all just trying to find peace There’s probably people with no souls And they just want us all to hurt Maybe we all hurt ourselves Or maybe something hurt us first Maybe it’s something that’s not human It could be life, it could be stupid It could be something we all enjoy It could be nothing at all and everything You pop up when I’m laying quiet You show up when I least expect There’s a light over there shining Maybe it’s God, maybe it’s just a shiny light There’s always humor in everything If you want there to be, it's there Maybe when I take my very last breathe Maybe I’ll go somewhere We all lie at night and we think I think of things that I wish I didn’t If I could be happy and not know I’d probably take that in an instance But I lie here and think of things Maybe everything’s just that simple It could be easy and I’m just masking it way harder Or maybe life is just an insult If I wanna make it easy Then I can in just an instant Now I’ll be happy and just remain Maybe I lie to save some face Maybe I’ll try to be a better person And try to stay out of the way If I float up in the sky Man I wonder what I would find Would I find heavens? Maybe hell Would I find reasons or sky monsters? Would I find angels or just demons? Would I find stars or cardboard boxes? Would I find holograms and paintings? Would I find you and me just hanging? Would I find dragons and fighting cheetahs? Would I find horses and lions teething? Would I find bulls without their horns? Would I find something I can’t think of? Would I find lady bugs and sprinklers? Would I find dogs and things like people? Would I find oceans that have no fishes? Would I find whales that just had triplets? Would I find someone that looks just like my mom and talks so softly? Would I find things that do no wrong? Would I find corpses and black widows? Would I find pajama pants and pillows? Would I find hollow trees and willows? Would I find dirt that makes you see through different objects? Would I find breaks in everything? Would I find glue to fix the breaks? Would I find a jungle of duct tape? Would I find more than you could listen? Would I find answers to my wishes? Would I find people who aren’t people? I hope I find a lot of things I’ll find myself maybe I’ll never Maybe you’ll just never find me Maybe I’ll do heroin with tigers And when you want someone to hold you I’ll be right there but look inside you Let’s take a camping trip Let’s take a camping trip Let’s take some things that we’ll remember Let’s light some candle sticks Now I lay smile on my face I did some things, I lived a day I know there’s nothing, it just makes me happy making something Because there’s nothing anyways Should I keep going on forever? If I wanted, I could do that But then we'd be doing this forever And I don’t know if we should do that Now after all there’s nothing left I can be okay or be angry What would I find if I just looked? If I want, I could look forever What would I find? What would I find? What would i find? What would I find? You want me to wrap it up Okay, that’s fine I just wonder what I’d find
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