When you've mislaid a certain something
Keep your cool and don't get hot
Calculatus Eliminatis
Is the best friend that you got
Calculatus Eliminatis
Always helps an awful lot
The way to find a missing something
Is to find out where it's not
It isn't there, I'll mark this X, I'll mark that Y
It isn't underneath the apple, "H", "K", "I"
It isn't under this keyhole
No?
And it isn't on my knee
Hmm, mark the keyhole "K-300" and the knee "5-7B"
We just jot down all the places
Where it isn't, and gee whiz
Very shortly we will locate where the
Missing object is
It isn't here
"8-42J"
And it isn't there
"F-607." You can mark the piano "22,000-decimal point-11"
It isn't in the icebox
That's strange
It's not on this TV
Off. Icebox "O-two-four and a half", TV "One million and three"
When you've mislaid a certain something
Keep your cool and don't go to pot
Calculatus Eliminatis
Is the best friend that you got
Calculatus Eliminatis
Always helps an awful lot
The way to find a missing something
Is to find out where it's not