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Buddha blessed and boo-ya blasted These are the words that she manifested A grim little tyke in a black pleather raincoat She stepped to the mike and said Repeat after me, there is no such thing as alternative hip-hop So Boo in the blue silk hoody pops up Hey baby you’d be a good-looking a man if you worked at it but what the f**k you know about hip-hop? Why he go and say that? She said, I know hip-hop like I know your mother Your mother so hip-hop I seen her laying pipe in Alaska Your mother so hip-hop she yеlled ho ‘fo I even axеd her Your mother so hip-hop she thinks biz markie’s cute as sh*t Your mother so hip-hop she told you, time to get off your d**k Next time you speak to your mother, send her my best Buddha blessed and boo ya blasted These are the words that she manifested: Hip-hop is inverse capitalism Hip-hop is reverse colonialism Hip-hop is the world the slaveholders made, sent into n***a-fide future shock Hip-hop is the plunder from down under, mackin all others for pleasure Hip-hop is the black aesthetic byproduct of the American dream machine, our culture of consumption, commodification, and subliminal seduction Where George Clinton warned us about Madison Avenue urge overkill, the pimping of the pleasure principle, hip-hop embraces the pleasures of the pimping principle Hip-hop is the first musical movement in history where black people pimped themselves before the white boy did Hip-hop pimped the funk before the white boy and heavy metal too Hip-hop is the perverse logic of capitalism pursued by an artform Like capitalism, hip-hop converts raw soul into store rack commodity Like capitalism, hip-hop has no morals, no conscience, and no ecological concern for the scavenged earth or the scavenged American minds it will wreck in its pursuit of new markets Unlike Sigourney weaver’s nemesis alien, hip-hop is not the other man’s rape fantasy of the black sex machine gone berserk Hip-hop is James Brown’s pelvis digitally grinded into technomorphine Hip-hop is dope-know-logy, the only known antidote for prime-time sensory deprivation There is no such thing as alternative hip-hop because the only alternative to hip-hop is is dead silence and we all know such silence signifies a lack of breath There is no such thing as good hip-hop or bad hip-hop, progressive hip-hop or reactionary hip-hop, politically incorrect hip-hop or hip-hop with a message Its either hip-hop or it ain’t. Sh*t Hip-hop is beyond good and evil, hip-hop is beyond life and death Hip-hop was dead but hip-hop reanimated Hip-hop does not live on YO! MTV Raps Hip-hop currently resides beneath the noise where all the fly girlz and boyz use hip-hop as a form of telemetry telepath and telekinesis Hip-hop is how you say I love you to a hip-hop junkie Hip-hop is your pa**word into the cult of hip-hop infomaniacs You know hip-hop when you see it You may not see hip-hop before it seizes you Hip-hop is not what it is today but what it could be tomorrow Hip-hop ain’t sh*t but everything is hip-hoppable mad flava beatable Hip-hop is pumas and a goody today but why not leather fringe and sequins tomorrow? If hip-hop wanted to be that corny, who could argue with it but a muhfuhkuh who was faded? What’s hip-hop today could easily become pa**é Arguing with hip-hop about the nature of hip-hop is like arguing with water about the nature of wetness Like Bunny Wailer said, some tings come to ya, some tings come at ‘cha, but hip-hop flows right through ya Hip-hop is so far gone up its own a** you can’t even speak on it unless you follow the trail of hip-hop’s intestines out the lower end Hip-hop is the rattlesnake that bit off its own tail, then listened to the death rattle warning the head that it was swallowing up the body Hip-hop is what happened when the black community became the Bermuda Triangle and lost track of itself on the radar screen of Reaganomics Hip-hop is the blip that boom-bipped then turned up to crack, black is back all in we’re gonna exterminate our own next of kin Pink people wanna know if other pink people like hip-hop how can it still be hip-hop? That’s like asking, if black people like Dirty Harry is he still Clint Eastwood? Hip-hop is beyond black nationalism Hip-hop is not hung up on counter-supremacy because it reigns supreme like all the other dope fiends Hip-hop is half black and half Japanese Hip-hop is digital chips on the shoulders of African lips Hip-hop is black Prozac Hip-hop is if you can’t join ‘em, beat ‘em, if you can’t beat ‘em, blunt ‘em Hip-hop is black sadomasochism Hip-hop is where the hurting ends and the feeling begins or is that the other way around? Hip-hop Is how we rip off the nad aids and pour saltpeter on the wounds Hip-hop is Ralph Ellison, who once said the blues is like running a razor blade along an open sore If it wasn’t for black English and hip-hop I wouldn’t have no blues at all Hip-hop is my black cat moan Hip-hop is my black cat scan Hip-hop is all I need to stop It’s time for my medicine Time to face the music again Buddha blessed and boo-ya blasted These are the words that she manifested
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