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It’s An Art
par
Stephen Schwartz
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Paroles
There's some as don't care When they put down the plate, there's a sound Not with me! When they move a chair It will scrape with a grate on the ground Not with me! I will have my hand right when I place a glass Notice how I stand right as customers pass Serve a demi-tasse with a gesture so gentle Or do it again till it's near oriental La, la la, la la, la! It's an art! It's an art! To be a fine waitress To see that you pleasure each guest There's a twist To my wrist When I bring your steak in And watch how I take in Your liver and bacon It all needs to be stylish and smart! That's what makes it an art I remember one day As I do now and then, I had shakes Down I went There with my tray Full of coffees and cordials and cakes Down I went But I kept my poise — not one guest heard me fall Never made a noise, not one noise, food and all If you have to crawl, you give 'em what they like You carry your tray like It's almost ballet-like! La-da-da-da-da-da-la-da-da-da-da-da-dum It's and art! It's an art! To be a fine waitress Each evening I treasure the test Like tonight was a fight 'Cause they hired this busboy This clothes-all-a-muss-boy And guests heard him cuss — boy! Did we have a quick "heart-to-heart"! Even that is an art... Tips! Ha! Tips are important to people like captains and barmen For them, it's a tip, see? For me, I'm a gypsy Just toss me a coin and I suddenly feel like I'm Carmen! So on through the ulcer The backache, the hot sweaty feet On you go Through "Is your knife dull sir?" And "Madam wants what with her meat?" On you go Two A.M. approaches, the curtains descend There among the roaches, my act's at an end Every night I tend to find myself crying There's no work so trying Or so satisfying... It's an art! It's an art! To be a great waitress To do without leisure or rest So I zoom Through the room With a flair no one else has An air no one else has I swear no one else has my lilt When I say "A la carte" You can see it gives me a glow Every time I prove I'm a pro Maybe I'm not quite Michelangelo! But I'm not just a waitress I'm a one woman show!
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