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The Morning After Voicemail
par
Machine Gun Kelly
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New messages... Hey yo, Kells, this is Puff man. Hey yo, what the f**k did y'all do to my crib last night, man?! Yo, I lent you the keys for 24 f**king hours, cause y'all mother-f**king n***as got kicked out of all the hotels on the east coast. I'm tryna to be a hospitable motherf**ker, I lend y'all the keys I come back to my house me and my chick and there ain't no mother-f**king front door, man! What the f**k did y'all do with the front door, man!? Then I walk in the house, me and her we thirsty, been out all day, want some mother-f**king Cîroc, y'all n***as drink up all the Cîroc. You got empty Cîroc bottles in my sh*t. At least throw the sh*ts in the garbage, and then this is what takes the cake: When I was showing you the crib, you know I told you about my mother-f**king Corinthian white-leather couch that cost me seventy-five thousand dollars from Florance, Italy. Y'all mother f**kers done tagged it up with a magic marker saying "laced up"! I don't know where the f**k y'all think y'all at, y'all like some Bob Derrick Cleavland n***as, man. Y'all just gotta have a little bit of class and pay some respect, this Corinthian leather from Florence! Somebody done wrote "laced up" on that sh*t, the only thing that's about to be laced up is my foot up one of your motherf**ker's asses! I'm madder than a motherf**ker and I will be deducting this Corinthian save... End of message... New messages... Yeah, and don't think you're getting away with that sh*t if I can't get this magic marker out of my seventy-five thousand-dollar white Corinthian imported-from-Florence couch. I will be making sure that sh*t is recoupable motherf**ker, but for real the only thing I'm really mad about is if y'all motherf**kers was gonna be raging this hard, you could have gave a n***a a mother-f**king heads-up! So I could have stayed and raged with you cause if that's surely the way you rage, I can't wait till I borrow your house, I'm gonna burn that motherf**ker down, man! I'm proud of y'all motherf**kers, for real, this is some real fly sh*t, y'all have totally f**ked my house up! Lace up, b*t*h! Bad Boy! EST! Hey yo motherf**ker, bring my front door back. End of message...
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