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Cognitive Dissonance Blues
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The Narcissist Cookbook
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So I was in the supermarket the other day picking up Stock cubes for this vegetable curry that I survived on for most of 2020 An’ I - an’ I - and I Flipped them over to look at the ingredients on the back No idea why I should know what’s in them by now But as soon as I did I remembered Why I don’t do that anymore And I felt my mood just nosedive Because I realized I had forgotten Again About palm oil Which And I don’t intend to go on and on about it But which is used in fifty percent of all packaged products on the market It’s leading to mass deforestation in Malaysia and Indonеsia Destroying the environmеnts of endangered animals on a massive scale Et cetera Et cetera Et cetera You know the rest We all do I am tired of hearing about it to be honest And I realized at that moment that I’d been actively putting that sh*t out of my head whenever I can Because To be honest to do otherwise is to wander from aisle to aisle in a hollow daze Remembering that in the nineties Coca-Cola was hiring far-right paramilitary forces to assassinate trade union leaders in Colombia to keep their manufacturing costs as low as possible Remembering that Nestle’s CEO believes access to drinking water shouldn’t be a human right, as the drain and bottle billions of gallons of the world’s freely available water for resale It makes you tired, you know It makes you wonder “what’s the point” And so f**k it I pick up my Coke I pick up my Oreos I pick up my stock cubes And I put the truth away again for awhile Which every time I do it feels just a little bit more like a tacit nod of approval Here’s a short horror story for you: It is conceivable at least that the distant stars that inspired Jules Verne and Gene Roddenberry are orbited by planets that are intellectually empty No galaxy-spanning civilizations or glittering cities or Dyson Spheres No one blinking back at us through alien telescopes wondering if they’re alone out here Just us Humanity The smartest, wisest, kindest of all of the creatures in God’s deep blue infinity And personally I am still trying to reconcile that possibility with the the aforementioned list of crimes we commit against ourselves Our political systems that incentivise corruption Healthcare systems that punish anyone guilty of being both sick and poor at once And all of those things underpinned by a rusted, groaning economic system that can only function when lubricated with blood If there really is no one out there No one smarter, or wiser, or kinder than us If this He says gesturing wildly at the entirely of existence Really is as good as it gets Maybe this is an opportunity for us Ya know To do the humane thing for once As a novelty Do it quickly Do it cleanly and together Our first and last act as a truly global society to surge forward and embrace autoerotic euthanasia Fill our coat pockets with gold bullion and walk hand in hand into the ocean singing kumba-f**king-ya I’ve been hearing more and more of this disingenuous eco-fascist bullsh*t over the last few years And I understand it I understand the despair when we Mighty look upon our works But I am sick to the clogged gills of accepting fault for it Because the fact is we do not all share responsibility for this The vast majority of us are preoccupied with struggling to survive on a monthly if not weekly basis On wages barely high enough to keep us alive Sometimes not even that high It is insulting to suggest that the average person has any influence Whatsoever Over the corpo-political incestual f**kfest that determines how the people of this planet ultimately coexist Or the direction of society is influenced significantly less by who the majority elected to govern it than it is by who can afford to underwrite the biggest brutal lobbyist When the only crime the megarich consistently serve time for is f**king the money up When in 2020 suddenly the empires of billionaires are expanding like wildfires While hundreds of thousands of workers lost their homes, livelihoods Sometimes even lives And with this in mind Here’s an alternate short horror story for you: The human race, I think, is fundamentally good At its root At its core A species gifted with, to varying degrees, a seemingly infinite imagination that has filled our libraries over the centuries with thirty million unique works of fiction An unprecedented capacity for tool use that took us from inventing the aeroplane to punting a person into space in less time than it takes a human being to reach retirement age We are Let us not forget The Mother of the Welfare State And penicillin And mid-nineties era Green Day This is us at our very very best But machine we are wired into without our consent It stretches us thin It wrings us dry Anything good Anything pure Anything that cannot justify its existence by pointing to a rise in shareprice is deemed ultimately unfit to survive Take the internet, for example In 1969, data was sent from a terminal at UCLA to a terminal at Stanford hundreds of miles away And lo Fifty years later the internet has single-handedly changed the world more dramatically than perhaps any invention in human history It should by all rights have been the Next Great Step on the path to a borderless society A global neural network allowing us to share art and science and philosophy instantaneously Allowing the ideas blooming in our collective consciousness to evolve at the speed of imagination rather than the speed of the postal service Instead though it became a mean to force feed each of us our own personal advertising campaign Targeted with the precision of a Raytheon Maverick And if you think They have run out of ways to shock blast that wilderness with sh*t from corner to corner then strap in Because the internet as we have known it isn’t even likely to exist for much longer Because the governments of the world have been twitching uncomfortably for years now as they realize how hard it is to control a populace Who have real time access to all the information about everything ever on a tiny computer that lives in their pocket We built this brilliant beautiful thing out of plastic and wire and it was deliberately and maliciously lobotomized by people that thought it gave the pack mules too much freedom Too much power And this is just one example in a list that seems to stretch on and on into forever like a Star Wars title crawl With new crimes against humanity being added so fast that no one could ever hope to read it all And I am done sharing the blame for the state of this place with the f**king dragons Who have the resources to feed everyone Clothe everyone House and educate and heal everyone And who choose not to time and time again Who actively and often violently push back against attempts to beg for more pebbles from their mountain of wealth For example Did you know that Amazon workers frequently earn so little that they rely on government top-ups and overtime just to tread water above the poverty line While their CEO Jeff Bezos has so much f**king money that if you count it by one number every second, everyday, without sleep, it would take you over thirty years just to count up to the amount of money he has Oh no, wait a second, I misread that He actually has one hundred and eighty-five times that amount He has more money than the human mind is capable of imagining More than anyone could ever spend in multiple lifetimes And that’s just the money we know about Because remember in 2015 It was headline news across the world A global conspiracy by the financial elite to hide trillions of dollars in unreachable, illegal bank accounts in Panama And what happened there Oh yeah The journalist who broke the story was assassinated in broad daylight with a f**king car bomb And the story just disappeared *clears throat* And I am standing here In the supermarket Wondering whether I can forgive myself for buying a pack of stock cubes That has f**king palm oil in it f**king God dammit man
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