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Broken Necklace
par
The Narcissist Cookbook
Regreso
Letra
You have one new voice message. Message received Tuesday at 2:23 hours *background noise of a beach, seagulls chirping, cars pa**ing by* Yo, uhm, uhhhh I broke the necklace The necklace that you gave me finally after wearing it for over four years, daily I snapped the cord at the wedding [?] on the weekend because I felt like it was choking me, literally Not metaphorically And yeah, I cop that irony so I tied it around my wrist because I felt guilty And it looked good, actually, and it felt good, like it was still a part of me And I genuinely, genuinely thought I was going to be wearing it forever, now I'm Not But now it's sitting on my coffee table at home, snapped clean in half, and I've- uhhh- superglued it back together plenty of times in the past but this time when I looked down and saw that it was broken This time a piece of it was- was- was missing Presumably lying in the road somewhere in town, or, I don't know, in somebody's bed, I guess I- I can't tell you how sorry I am See this was My agreement with you In my head If I can't- if I can't love you how you need to be loved, if I- if I can't stop myself from freaking out all day, every f**king day until I'm dead Then I will wear this necklace and I won't ever leave the house without it So if I'm walking down the street and I'm hit by a car Or my heart explodes in my chest, then They would tell you They would tell you that I was wearing it, when I went, and then you would know And then that would be your last memory of me, not the sight of me screaming from across the Atlantic Ocean, or audibly shaking down a telephone wire, but the news that I carried a piece of you everywhere with me In the shower In my sleep, when I was reading and writing and learning how to drive When I was Handling my sh*t and when I was losing my entire f**king mind And yeah, when I was falling in love with new people too Going entire days without thinking of you Getting resentful about the pile of your belongings still taking up much-needed space in the corner of my living room All the times when I hated myself And all the times when I was proud of myself, for trying not just to grow but to thrive, y'know? I never forgot who taught me the basics of what it means to be alive I made a promise And I broke it So I think I'm gonna take a photograph of that necklace and Put it on an album cover And then I'll memorize all of this And I'll recite it at every show, make it my four-minute watermark, because I still believe that if I can make everybody understand what you meant to me then that will act as my apology If I can't tell you how sorry I am then maybe the rest of the world Can do it for me This was my agreement with you in my head I can't love you, not how you need to be loved, but I can and so I will wear that around my neck every day All day Until I'm f**king dead- Message deleted. You have no new messages
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