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Problems Of A Playboy
par
Lil Minecart
Regreso
Letra
Whaddup bois, you already know who it is, Lil Minecart here. Yall must think I got everything perfect. But that ain’t the case. You see, I got problems too. Big problems. Girthy Problems. Let me tell you what I got problems Not everything perfect Just broke up with my main b*t*h smurfette You know her coochie blue She had a nice hue It too bad that she live in a shoe But them shoes ain’t Nike I shall strike thee I’ll hit you then I’ll break my hand Like i’m taking down a tree Used to be a poor man Now I ain’t broke Used to be with no plan Then my girl had a stroke Got financial compensation Traveled all across the nation Now I got too many people goin’ on my page and- F**k the rap life Too many chats like “OMG I love you, lick my clit” Sure, nope SIKE Plus my lag spike This I dislike Man why Xfinity be f**kin up my life? (Damn) I spent my last 20 on some sticky icky icky Might have the stiffy, uh, but who the f**k is blicky? Plus my side b*t*h gave me a f**king hickey What if my mom sees?---Man that’d be sh*tty Get a girl in bed and she lookin at me funny I ask “what?” and she respond “oh it’s nothin honey” My pants come down and she starts to laugh This b*t*h don’t like my 2 inch staff? GOD I got problems! Yeah, big a** problems Internet pedos, don’t even wanna block em Went up to the bus stop, finna go to stop 1 I thanked the bus driver, but abandoned my stepson I got problems! Yeah, big a** problems But you know that I ain’t about to solve em Mined too far, now I hit rock bottom Mom ain't proud, should probly get a job, um F**k that, I’m already getting paid By sittin on the couch and drinkin Kool Aid All these goddamn women, that I gotta slay “HEY! … DON'T SAY THE LORD’S NAME IN VAIN!” Sheesh, mom’s got me on a leash You don’t understand me, and you never will, capeesh? “You’re spending too much time on that TV” Get out mom, I’m on a killing spree My raps too flame, caught my wolf on fire Tried to put it out, but that b*t*h went haywire Flames spread to my pants, now they callin me a liar But I’m too tired, call me a bike (HA) Last week I got meat Thought it was fresh Turns out that villager Sold me rotten flesh Now i’m hella famished My hunger bar vanished Now I’m in a panic Can’t manage, the damage Look at me I’m lil minecart Sittin here at half heart Rippin’ off a phat shart Lookin like some modern art I be dumb smart But here’s the bad part I got chlamydia I got problems! Yeah, big a** problems But you know that I ain’t about to solve em Mined too far, now I hit rock bottom Got so many diamonds, but nobody here to stock em Issues! Yeah thick a** issues! Always tellin truth ain't about the f**kin fake news Hella blue balled, never gettin any d**k use Just like my songs, I gotta drop a phat deuce Yo, gotta get back on the w****s Sh*t mom, I ain't got time for chores Lil minecart here breakin down doors Been in the mines, now I got too much ore Call it golden shower, I’m startin the hour I got so much IQ now im runnin outta brain power C*ck sour, superpowered, you covered like a cell tower (semen) I’m lit like glowstone Spit into this microphone I be failin spanish cla** I should use rosetta stone Gettin bad grades But pa**in all these tests How the f**k I get aids From feelin up yo mother’s breast STD, don’t test me Knock you out like KO 1,2,3 But i’m weak, (true) I don’t work out Arms floppy, (yup) and I don’t got clout Rhymes sloppy, (affirmative) but I don’t doubt Press copy rhymezone, them I’m out I got problems! Yeah, big a** problems But you know that I ain’t about to solve em Mined too far, now I hit rock bottom Got so many diamonds, but nobody here to stock em Pickle, I’m in a big a** pickle! Chargin dimes for sex but I only gotta nickel Emotions like gravel, yeah they hella fickle Hurt so bad, fishin rod in my d**k hole You guys ever just beat your meat and your hand gets stuck to your d**k? Yea me neither. The f**k right Just last week tried to get some logs My hand missed and I slapped a dog Chomped me on my left knee Pants soaked with wet pee F**ked him in the b*** Gotta call it beastiality Head filled with lettuce But I don’t eat vegetables Autism be genetic But it ain't the cause of all my troubles All these girls around me But they ain't attractable I’m just a nice guy This is unacceptable Minecraft skills respectable Social skills compatible Yet I got no girlfriend Cuz of tiny genitals All my fans swarmin like mobs Too many to count Worship me like a god Your b*t*h I mount Gonna ride her like a pig With a carrot and saddle Don’t challenge me To an Epic Rap Battle One time I gotta date (really) Call her a trap chest Took off her shirt (ooh) Suspiciously small breast Pulled down her pants (nice) She had a d**k (oh) Turns out her real name was Rick (OOF) Moral of the story Don’t a**ume genders Can’t think of a rhyme Chicken tenders (OUT)
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