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Islander Original Cast
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Eilidh: Gran, that's everybody Gran: All right, welcome! Take a seat, Blaire. As the chair of our 81st Spikkin, I want to make clear a few rules. Ah- I know most of you know, but for those that don't know: Both: Keep quiet when others are speaking All points of view have the right to be heard at the stand Stay 'till the end of the meeting And if you've got something to add, clearly raise up your hand Gran: We've all gathered here tonight to discuss an affa grave matter. About your island, and the future- Paul: My garden gnomе has been stolen Gran: Your gnome? Paul: I left homе, 'twas the morning, by lunch, he was gone Gran: Paul- Paul: Has anyone seen him? Gran: Paul! Paul: Yellow and green with a waistcoat. Poor Agatha's lonely without him Gran: Agatha? Paul: His wife Gran: Right. That's not quite what we're here to discuss Paul: But- Gran: Paul- Paul: But! Gran: Paul Paul: But! Gran: Paul Paul: Sorry Gran: The big land says it cannae afford to support our way of life any longer. It's offered to rehouse us, on the condition that we all quit the isle next month. Our task now is to consider this and any other option for next week's vote Paul: Flashback. Twenty year ago, my B&B, what a business, booming Ha! Full of life, now we've more holes in the roof than we've customers Both: Where's the investment the big land promised us? Paul: They're only giving us new homes to avoid spending cash on our island, and that's just not good enough! Blaire: Farming, it's in our DNA Ours is the last left on Kinnen But this year's the worst we've had We can't rival the farms on the big land and so We've decided that we'll be voting to go Man: Two things: funding and tourists. They'll sort us. The good will be back to you, I guarantee it Jenny: Can I? I think most of you know me, but I'm Jenny, so- hi. Since I first moved to Kinnen, so much has improved on Kinnen. Promise like nowhere I've been. Cloudfish, blue hock, gulls, greater numbers than I've ever seen Both: Even if we stay It's evident our way Of life's at the end of the rope Jenny: But if we throw open our doors, Kinnen's wildlife won't have a fighting hope Woman: This is our home! Jenny: It's theirs, too Paul: We need tourists, not birds Bill: Who cares about the lesser-spotted sea slug when I can't pay my rent? Jenny: Let's leave Kinnen to re-wild Woman: Typical incomer Man: Honest Bill: Ay, she's only been here six months, what does she know? Gran: Keep quiet when others are speaking Both: All points of view have the right to be heard at the stand Stay 'til the end of the meeting And if you've got something to add, clearly raise up your hand Gran: And, Braea, was there anything you want to share? Oh, come on, it's not like you to be shy, Braea, on you go Braea: New life And me I would stay Kinnen's my family, but... No doctor No teacher It's clear our only hope for the future is New blood We need new neighbors, not just tourists. Without incomers, Kinnen will die Bill: We'll find a way, we will Paul: Easy for you to say, Bill, you're retired! Bill: Cheek! Paul: No school or kids, a lollipop man would never even get hired Bill: We can't welcome everybody at the door! Woman: It'd change things! Gran: For the better! Paul: You'll change your tune when they steal from you, though, won't you Bill: And they'd pollute our way of life Woman: Tourists! I say evacuate Bill: You're only here half the year, what do you know? Gran: Keep quiet when others are speaking All points of view have the right to be heard at the stand Stay 'til the end of the meeting Eilidh (simultaneously): Hi, everyone! It's me, Eilidh. Isn't there a way we can have the best of both worlds? If we just listen to each other, then- sorry! I'm trying to speak Both: And if you've got something to add, clearly raise up your hand Eilidh: Hello? Everybody! Listen!
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