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The Dog Song
par
2017 Broadway Cast of Sunday in the Park with George
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If the head was smaller If the tail were longer If he faced the water If the paws were hidden If the neck was darker If the back was curved More like the parasol Bumbum bum bumbumbum Bumbum bum... More shade More tail More gra** Would you like some more gra**? Mmmm... Ruff! Ruff! Thanks, the week has been rough When you're stuck for life on a garbage scow Only forty feet long from stern to prow And the crackpot in the bow-wow, rough The planks are rough And the wind is rough And the master's drunk and mean and Gruff! Gruff! With the fish and sc*m And planks and ballast The nose gets numb And the paws get callused And with splinters in your a** You look forward to the gra** On Sunday The day off Off! Off! Off! Off! (spoken) The gra** needs to be thicker. Perhaps a few weeds. With some ants, if you would. I love fresh ants. (sung) Roaming around on Sunday Poking among the roots and rocks Nose to the ground on Sunday Studying all the shoes and socks Everything's worth it Sunday The day off Bits of pastry Piece of chicken There's a handkerchief That somebody was sick in There's a thistle That's a shallot That's a dripping From the loony with the palette Yap! Yap! Yap! Out for the day on Sunday Off my lady's lap at last Yapping away on Sunday Helps you forget the week just past Everything's worth it Sunday The day off Yep! Stuck all week on a lady's lap Nothing to do but yawn and nap Can you blame me if I yap? Nope. There's just so much attention a dog can take. (sung) Being alone on Sunday Rolling around in mud and dirt Begging a bone on Sunday Settling for a spoiled dessert Everything's worth it Sunday The day off Something fuzzy Something furry Something pink That someone tore off in a hurry What's the muddle In the middle? That's the puddle Where the poodle Did the piddle
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