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Kfc
by
Zach Sherwin
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How large are your breasts? How large are your breasts? We used to prank call the Kentucky Fried Chicken And ask, "How large are your breasts?" I was chilling in my house with my friend Aaron Cooper Both of us enormously bored at home So, of course, we were horsing around On my family's old-school Panasonic cordless phone We were 13 and 12 -- just the right ages to call Every KFC in the white pages, and have ourselves a giggle fest While we asked, "How large are your big ol' breasts?" Now, it was Coop's turn to place the next prank-call Boy, did he mess it up, the prank tanked, y'all! 'Cause when he pressed "talk" and at that exact second My mom called home from work to chick-a-check in! The timing was the damnedest thing 'Cause the phone didn't even have the chance to ring! So, as far as Coop knew, he was placing a call He didn't realize he was answering! Now, when Coop put his ear to the phone Did he hear a dial tone? No! You guessed correctly I mean, there was somebody on the other end But he hadn't dialed any numbers yet So, unless we kept a hotline that connected directly How could he be talking to the KFC? Mighty perplexed he was, and so flustered It made him screw up the joke Here's how it went, verbatim: Coop; "Hello?" My mom; "Hello?" Coop; "Uh, do you have young breasts?" My mom; "Aaron? Is that you?" Coop; "Please don't tell my parents!" Click!
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