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Lucky You
by
Tom MacDonald
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I never fit in at school and work was a headache I struggled all my life to be happy and get the rent payed The only friends I had were in my head on cassette tapes I got bullied half to death, I was stressed, I felt like some dead weight I kept it to myself and bottled everything inside And every tiny piece of me I felt like people wouldn't like I tried to hide them in the deepest, darkest corners of my mind And when I cried I was embarrassed, told my parents I was fine I was ashamed, but I just wanted mom to hold me So afraid I medicated daily when I smoked weed I couldn't come to terms with all the reasons I was bullied So I slowly built my walls up over time until I noticed I was lonely I felt like they forgot me Neglected by everybody I would fantasize about shoveling dirt on their bodies Looking back I was lucky that I survived and I made it And they're lucky I used my imagination I kept it all inside, been bottled up for all this time (You're so funny) Lucky you I ain't a kid no more, I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody) Fuck you Yeah, I couldn't fit in with the kids, I was the outcast Started skipping school 'cause I was happier without class Tried to drown it out with fruity alcohol and loud rap I wonder if those kids are sorry now, somehow I doubt that I blocked it out for twenty years, it still hurts, the pills worked But I still can't forget how much it killed me, need to heal first Talkin' to my therapist, afraid I'm weak, I will learn At least the bad experiences turned into a ??? I remember when these kids invited me to dinner They poured water on my head from the roof with a pitcher They could've actually killed me, it was the middle of the winter I walked home frozen solid, frostbitten and bitter I felt like they forgot me Neglected by everybody I would fantasize about shoveling dirt on their bodies Looking back I was lucky that I survived and I made it And they're lucky I used my imagination I kept it all inside, been bottled up for all this time (You're so funny) Lucky you I ain't a kid no more, I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody) Fuck you I felt so small and worthless I thought that I deserved it I kept it under the surface But I gotta let it out And right now is perfect I kept it all inside, been bottled up for all this time (You're so funny) Lucky you I ain't a kid no more, I'll beat your ass and go to court (Nobody) Fuck you
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