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I Don’t Drink
by
Tom MacDonald
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Lyrics
I screwed up, I just wanna say I'm sorry It's all my fault, you should probably ignore me Oh my God, should've given you a warning All my friends are sick and tired of this story I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk I'm annoying Call your phone when it's three in the morning Start a fight, parked a whip in your garden You prolly think I am mentally retarded Please don't call me crazy 'cause I'm not Last night I had one too many shots Blacked out, got arrested by the cops Woke up on the neighbors front lawn Every time that I'm hangover I convince myself I'm dying Where the hell my pants go and why is my girlfriend crying I say that I remember what I did but I am lying There's a tattoo on my buttcheek, it's a beer can and he's smiling I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history We made it out alive and that's a victory Black eyes, minor injuries We lost a fight together that's a win to me I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk I'm retarded Ask around, I'm the life of the party Hold my beer, 'cause I'm only getting started Who cares about tomorrow and the misery I'm a mess and I know you don't deserve it You're the best and I'm a pretty stupid person None-the-less you try to help me 'cause I'm hurting I confess, sometimes I feel like I'm not worth it I don't drink, 'cause when I drunk I'm a problem I don't care who I hurt, I feel awesome Holy crap, it's either jail or a coffin Soon enough, I'ma be at rock bottom Please help, tell me, how I end up here? Last night, I had one too many beers Flashbacks, but I can't remember clear Why I texted all my ex-es and we haven't spoke in years Every time that I'm hangover, last night doesn't feel so funny I threw up on my front step and I wasted all of my money I got naked in the night club right in front of all my buddies Then I went home with some girl I thought was hot, but she is ugly I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history We made it out alive and that's a victory Black eyes, minor injuries We lost a fight together that's a win to me I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk I'm retarded Ask around, I'm the life of the party Hold my beer, 'cause I'm only getting started Who cares about tomorrow and the misery You call my phone, 'kay be quiet, can you hear it? I don't hear it Damn, oh no, my sexy photos can we clear it? We need to clear it I'm pretty sure the last night went down in history We made it out alive and that's a victory Black eyes, minor injuries We lost a fight together that's a win to me I don't drink 'cause when I'm drunk I'm retarded Ask around, I'm the life of the party Hold my beer, 'cause I'm only getting started Who cares about tomorrow and the misery
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