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Phoenix Wright The Musical SUPERCUT (”The Turnabout Encounter”)
by
Random Encounters
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1. Objection Calls came in approaching midnight. Calls at midnight... Someone died due to a fall. What kind of fall? Tell about the fall please! Claims were made that Miss Fey shoved him. Miss Fey shoved him? Here she's seen right afterwards in the hall. Excellent photo! There's something certainly very wrong-- Objection! Where's the face here to ID? Looks like she's facing the wrong way... Hold it! That's her outfit; you can see. It is! That's totally her outfit! Objection! Those are clothes! Who knows who's wearing those robes underneath? Where's the proof that she was up on the roof? Oh, here's the shot where she leaves! What?! Hey, that's me! I... have a tendency to sleepwalk. Every killer knows her victim. By and large, that's true. Maya Fey knew Larry Butz. She knew the Butz! Something smells like Butz here... Not sure why Ms. Maya picked him. Picked the victim? But we fear it's clear that she went nuts. Pretty unlikely, 'cause I can't vet this story yet-- Objection! On arrest was Maya sane? Now that I think about it... Hold it! That's an easy thing to feign. Actually, it's way harder than it looks. Objection! There's no motive here, Objection! To that idea too! I'll object to each ridiculous point proposed by any of you! Mr. Wright, Please do desist disrupting court! We get the gist! No need to constantly insist "Objection!" Of course, I know, but-- No "take that"s, and no retorts! No second chance, No last resorts! I'll hold you in contempt of court! Correction! My witness has more to add. Detective, update your testimony. When the night guards found the body... Poor old Larry... Led by Oldbag and her team. Such a... shady... Surly... lady... It was brought to Dr. Hotti. Dr. Hotti? Maya was arrested near the scene. That's how it happened! I'm really, really sorry, but Objection! Where's the proof that Larry fell? Other than the messy chalk outline, pal? Take that! There's his ID badge as well. Hold it! How'd she know the victim went up outside on the roof? Objection! If you claim that your defendant's being framed And if you argue she's to blame Then all the same I ask you, Where's the proof? OBJECTION! 2. Loser You think you're different You do nothin' but win, but I know you're really a sham. You think you've got a special aura within you, but now you've found out you're a scam! You think you're still the sharpest tool in the shed, and believe me, I did too. But now I'm a loser... And so are you. (Wright: Oh, hey, look at the time! It's half past SHUT YOUR FACE AND LEAVE ME ALONE. Pacific daylight time.) Oh... For years you still believed that no one could touch you, but You then got poked in the eye. The ace attourney turned a chump and a fool, who continued to doubt and deny! He's all washed up, and all his luck has run out. He's a has-been, through and through. Because he's a loser... Wright: And so are you. (Paine: I'll drink to that!) You're just a part of the trend. And for a loser, losin' don't end. No one to turn to, Everyone spurns you, 'til you've no friends... But just for fun, let's both pretend that-- You were a lawyer full of talent and promise, but You finally choked and bit the dust! And let's assume you once were valient and honest, but Still your career was a bust! You beat me every time we met in the court, Yet my wildest dreams came true! 'Cause though I'm a loser... Now so are you. 3. Turnabout Edgeworth: Where is the Butz? Show me Larry's broken bones or his bent appendages! Where are his cuts? Tell me where he's bleeding! Are you conceding this? Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! von Karma: Don't look so smug! Don't forget your client still lacks a solid alibi! Edgeworth: OBJECTION! Maya was drugged from her medication... Maya: That would explain why I... Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! (simultaneously) Edgeworth: It all comes down to this moment. ...and we've put it all on the line. So now let's see if we've blown it. Time to win the case or resign! Judge: One more twist. One last kink. This is it. I need a drink... von Karma: I won't be beaten by these fools. They think they're clever and they're cool. But now it's time for them to see... ...they can't beat me! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout! Turnabout, turnabout-bout! 4. Evidence Maya: It was nice of the Judge to let me tag along with you. Phoenix Wright: He gets kind of weird and antsy waiting for conclusive evidence. Maya: Yes, speaking of... ...what exactly are we looking for? Phoenix Wright: Anything that proves you didn't murder Larry Butz. Maya: Right... Phoenix Wright: Some clothing. Some blood. Any loose thread that we can pull on... and if we pull on it hard enough, Gumshoe's whole story will start to unravel. Maya: Clothing. Blood. Got it. Phoenix Wright: A drop of blood could blow this wide open. Maya: A bit of cloth could wind up the key. Phoenix Wright: A pair of prints could change the whole trial. Maya: A single thread is the thing we need! Maya: Hey, Nick! I found a... magatama... Phoenix Wright: A couple cracks could make a big difference. Maya: A minor flaw could solve the whole case. Both: A single thread could be our undoing. Ms Oldbag: I'll take that! Maya: Hey! Phoenix Wright: That's our evidence! Ms Oldbag: That you found on MY roof! Phoenix Wright: Give it back, Oldbag... Ms Oldbag: This will make a great gift for my Edgie-poo. Ms Oldbag: Nothing slips past old Wendy Oldbag! No one escapes my baggy eye! That's right, you gotta be quick to beat the Oldbag! Now get off of my roof and say goodbye! 5. Wright is Wrong Mr. Wright, you don't go down quietly, do you? There's an old saying that the phoenix will rise up from the flame. But this ain't no drama off Broadway or courtroom video game! Now you've run out of chances and this trial's taken too long, So let's end this... All the evidence was here all along! Because Wright is wrong! Well, Mr. Wright? The witness could have... shot the victim? I don't think so. All of your logic is faulty. Your plans are all a disgrace! All of your traps are outdated. Your tricks blow up in your face! Sad to break the illusion, but it's true, I knew all along. You can't fool me... Is it cruel of me to say it in song? Because Wright is wrong! He... he's just jealous of your hair... Forgive my lack of tact, but Wright knows little more than jack, 'Cause he's a wacky crackpot quack, exactly that, a backward hack! In fact, in spite of what's been said, in light of Wright's quite empty head, Mr. Wright is wrong! Take it easy on me, Miles! Whose side are you on? Now that you feel yourself sinking and watch things go up in smoke, Finally you see you're in trouble, but all your gimmicks are broke! Bluffs are just a distraction, and your case is clearly not strong, So let's end this... And send Wright right back to where he belongs! Because Wright is wrong! Wright is wrong! Wright is wrong. 6. Witness Phoenix: What do you know of Larry's murder? (Seems like he fell of the roof, pal.) Got any trace of foul play? (I don't ask questions. I just sweep.) What did you find inside of the body? (Here's my autopsy report.) Have you a bead on any lead 'cuz I need it today. (Actually, a piece of evidence was stolen. Stolen? (Yeah! Our blue badger security Camera!) Detective Gumshoue: Up on the roof we had it stationed. (...and this badger was a witness?) Filming the world through cold dead eyes. (So the murder removed it...) Beard: unintelligible ooghs (Uhh, translation?) (Beats me, pal. He just keeps saying that.) Phoenix: I think a view up on the roof could undo a few lies. Oldbag: Get of my roof, you spiked-haired nimrod! (Hey, Ms Oldbag! You work here?) Find someone else to go impugn. (Look, my friend's on trial for murder...) Take it from me, that girl is a killer! (Have you even MET her?) The push and the fall, I saw it all in the light of the moon. (I have to go, but Maya's innocent... You'll see.) Stay of my roof, Whippersnapper!
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