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Olivia Gatwood
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Directives from the US Armed Forces to female soldiers on how to deal with sexual a**ault in the military When it happens you will not understand why You thought this only happened to the pair of vessel legs wobbling its way down the cement to the girl who looks like confetti drinking her rum but not you not you with your knotted bun with your taped down breasts those pants do not flaunt your pubic bone that vest does not hug your waist this is not a place to decorate yourself and you thought you made all the right moves but do not be fooled by your body armor do not think it will make you less desirable to these men these men love it when you dress like this when you smell like this When you wrap a beautiful gift in ugly paper like this it is easy to hurt someone who looks just like you especially when you hate yourself he has been living inside of his own pulse for months ripping apart his pheromones convincing himself that the man in the next cot might just feel like a woman if he closes his eyes and opens his hands you are the solution darling and doesn't that make you feel worth something you were the pill the bourbon the anatomical shrink stop making excuses for yourself when he doesn't know how to speak softly remember he has been taught to bellow when he uses his hands like a steel ram treats your body like the locked door remember he's been taught not to knock first when he doesn't respond to the sound of your voice remember he has forgotten the sound of his wife's how can you possibly blame an animal for its lack of table manners this is not a game of tattletale don't come to me with your regrets This place is where bad decisions are born the question is how you deal with it when this happens and you crack you are not a victim. you are a liability you are one step behind in the march You are too many phone calls to your mother you're loose boots, lazy shots, and easy fix and most of all you are a burden You will be discharged early with the salute of a soldier and a stomach like knotted rope a gutted car in the valley your uniform is a small dog nipping at your hemline your family will not know how to praise you and you will not try to teach them fear is marching next to the enemy but shooting at a stranger fear is a loaded barrel and not knowing who to kill this is a war between your body and your country which side are you on
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