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Chrissy Teigen, Please
by
Nick Lutsko
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It's been a hard year, don't need to list the reasons why But I can sincerely say the greatest moment of my life was When Chrissy Teigen followed me on Twitter, but I took it for granted And posted the dumbest sh*t imaginable I promise to be normal, I swear I'm not deranged I'm asking to be cordial, I'm telling you I've changed Chrissy Teigen, please You've got me on my hands and knees I'm begging you to follow me again Back when life was sweet Remember I made that funny tweet I promise I can make you laugh again With classics like "I Am the Irishman" It's the content you crave (I am the Irishman) I won't take my shirt off, I swear I'll behave (I am the Irishman) I'll post the Irishman theme song every day (I am the Irishman) Chrissy Teigen, what's the reason you unfollowed my page? (I am the Irishman) Chrissy Teigen, I can't sleep until you follow my page (I am the Irishman) Hi Chrissy, I just wanted to say I'll always cherish the time when you followed my page, and uh, if you choose not to follow me back, I forgive you and, uh, wish you the best.
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