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Put Down The Remote (2009 Emmys Opening Song)
by
Neil Patrick Harris
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Lyrics
Put down the remote 'Cause this song what I wrote Is a welcome you should not miss Put down the remote Every note from this throat Is like a not-to-be-Tivo'd kiss Don't touch that dial Yes, it's been quite a while Since a dial was in style But you know what I mean Don't jump online 'Cause this fine mug of mine Needs a huge high-def screen! Turn off that phone 'Cause I want you alone For the treasures I've got to share Don't hit that fridge Oh boy! Let's abridge Your sweet derrière! Don't flip that switch Aren't you curious which Stars got Emmys vote? Don't hit the loo And whatеver you do Put down the remotе! The stars are all here Tina Fey! What a year! Sarah Palin did you no wrong Thank God the “boob tube” Rhymes with “Tony Shalhoub” Or he wouldn't be in this song! I see such legends galore Like McLaine! Barrymore! Every dame looks so luscious and cool But like season on “Idol” I'm not seeing Paula Abdul! Straight from Mad Men, there's Joan Ah, the curves she has shown It would make a blind man say, “Damn” She could turn a gay straight— Oh wait, never mind, there's Jon Hamm! And though it's true I'm a nominee, too I'll try not to gloat But it's a gas to be praised And it's certainly raised my quote! I know at home you've got A&E, ABC, Starz and Biography NBC, BET, Fox and Discovery IFC, Spike TV, C-SPAN and TNT AMC, History, Disney and QVC CBS, PBS, TBS, and I guess CNN, TBN, Showtime and Oxygen— Whatever floats your boat! Can't you watch it later? Yeah, you potatoes at home Don't let your fingertips roam Tonight the Emmy is hitting the town So put down the remote!
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