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IV. Contemplation
by
Kid Vision
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Lyrics
[David Hoeschen] We tend to focus on the bad things in our lives Sometimes you have to take a step back and realize It is what it is Ohh I've been thinking a lot lately About what it was that made me this way Nothing seems to go right man it crazy And all this hate in my mind it has started to change me I just wanna spit some words of advice I have so many regrets left in my life I just wish something could should and would go right My life is so dark when i know my future is bright Looking back at what I could've done different Its hard cause the situations are inconsistent How am i supposed to learn if all I do is miss it The point i keep missing is that reality has grown so distant Relationships are a thing of the past I'm never going back Even if I feel alone i know i still have my mom and dad My fam's there even if no one was when my life was bad When it was shit i can't help but think Girls are so full of it Man I'm a bout to quit This shit and get lit and drown in a bottle of gin That way i could forget the madness And focus on the magic The fabric of my friends that hold together the havoc Of this f*cking life that i fill with bad habits We live in a time Where love dims over time Were on our phones all the time So we don't talk in real life The highlight of these times Was looking into her eyes Not in a picture but real life I wish she realized That we fell apart because of this very reason That didn't rhyme f*ck I'm a mess Ohh I've been thinking a lot lately About what it was that made me this way Nothing seems to go right man it crazy And all this hate in my mind it has started to change me Ohh I've been thinking a lot lately About what it was that made me this way Nothing seems to go right man it crazy And all this hate in my mind it has started to change me Yeah I'm sick of feeling like a pushover When I start something with a lover I've been cheated and stranded and branded with the label that I'm just like every other You know I've walked in on a girl having sex she was my crush And she knew that which is why I'm even more crushed I trusted her and we've been through so damn much I thought finally id have someone to keep and touch But I was wrong she was so heartless And i can stop but wonder what I did to wind up like this My friends tell me it wasn't my fault but deep down i know it is Because I'm a f*cking p*ssy and I feel like I'm worthless But that's only at my lows i still feel like a pushover But at my highs I feel like I'm the one controller I got ice but I'm lit maybe I'm bipolar But everyone in my life gives me the cold shoulder She said she needed time what a pathetic excuse because if we talked it through it would fix the issue I don't wanna name names but you would talk to that dude I know its f*cked up but somehow i miss you Now I've turned to drugs, chewing my nails, biting my lip Everything I could think of doing to cope with it But nothing seems to help this depression I'm living with f*ck Why do I do this? Ohh I've been thinking a lot lately About what it was that made me this way Nothing seems to go right man it crazy And all this hate in my mind it has started to change me Ohh I've been thinking a lot lately About what it was that made me this way Nothing seems to go right man it crazy And all this hate in my mind it has started to change me I've been cheated on more than once I've been stranded and left alone without anyone to clutch I've been at the point of anger without anything to punch I've been loved but that shit isn't enough I know that I have the best friends in the world But I still feel like I'm alone in this world Because I've been hated but loved man what a world Which is the truth I wish I understood these girls I've been contemplating my life and its so aggravating I've been concentrating on what matters but I'm estimating Its so irritating but its oddly motivating I've been hesitating but i need to start operating On what the f*ck to do because its obviously not working Can't you see I'm heartbroken whys no one helping People are f*cking selfish while I'm over here hurting Can't you see things you think matter most mean nothing One of my friends said that your loved by more people then you can count But it doesn't mean shit if its not by the ones that count I been through things that i can't afford to think about All this struggle and they blame me for not opening up Bitch i was about to open up Before you f*cked him when you were drugged up What the f*ck were you thinking when you took his dick out Ohhh you made the excuse that you were drunk now Bullshit! Drunk actions illustrate sober thoughts Now i ask myself why I'm messing with these thots If i keep trying for love, what will be the cost She said she was drunk ha its not my loss Try to think some more that's not a f*cking excuse Because your mind was still on in hot pursuit I know you would've done it if you were sober too You were just drunk enough to do it when i was in front of you Now I know all girls don't do this shit I've talked about in the past But i was just unlucky enough to fall for the ones that have I just wish there was some way that I could go back I'm not talking as Kid Vision I'm talking as me Zac
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