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Lose My Mind
by
Joell Ortiz & KXNG Crooked
Featuring(s) : Blakk Soul
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Lyrics
[YEBBA] I, I I, I I, I (Heatmakerz) 'Bout to lose my- [Joell Ortiz] Grandma used to tell me everything'd be okay Radiator broke and the cold won't go away Sick for six days, man, this cold won't go away Elevator stuck and there's no hot water Another night takin' baths in that stove top water Mom's runnin' out the house when her blow got shorter Somewhere in the Bronx, this nigga Po shot Porter It's rich families on TV with a Robot daughter I'm standin' in the arcade and don't got quarters Sneakers got the lean, make my low top shorter Lint in my hair, snot in my nose (What else?) Stains on my gear, nobody knows what it feels like To feel like, in real life, you gotta lie To feel like your real life don't feel like you not alive Standin' in the spot where your partner died Too young to see homicide, you traumatized Visions of the back of your father's ride Pullin' off, you smellin' the exhaust while your mama cries (Word) A young man with nobody left to idolize 28 grams, y'all know the bottle size My block got monetized, monopolized, had my own park place Never put they whip in my spot I'm drivin' by in my hood right now Thinkin' how the hell I survived that liquor every night Chicken wings, a side of fries And beef that never took a day off Stay off the strip durin' holidays with fireworks 'Cause they are the perfect camoflauge for drama to let the K off And never take work you can't pay off if somethin' go wrong Runnin' from the law everywhere To plush views with first class seats From no views to you choose You never thought this would be Didn't wanna be a victim no more (So I decided that I) I just knew I wanted more So I didn't lose my- [KXNG Crooked] They cut our electric off, extension cord through the window Borrowing juice from my neighbors just to play my Nintendo My mama's boyfriend Lorenzo was blazing some indo He always keeps some weed, but never be around when it's time to help pay the rent though Time to keep all the ends meeting Eviction notice on my door, even my friends seen it I'm embarrassed due to that fact, be in my crib, dreamin' I could wear some shoes that I like, hearin' my inner demons If a pair of shoes what you lack Go over there and move you a sack to them niggas fiendin', greezin', ain't intervenin' Now I'm payin' dues wit' them packs Dropped outta school without a parachute on my back and hit the streets hard Please, God, bless the father's raisin' them seeds up Or else it's blue flags, both arms raisin' them C's up (What's happenin', cuh?) Ain't no grey point, average raisin' them B's up (What's happenin', blood?) Tried to tell you, we damaged, no one believed us We witnessin' terrifiyng events Hide the pain from our parent, my apparent line of defense If my mama knew I watched my dude perish right on the fence She'd be scared 'cause I'm in the trenches with hammers and wrenches I'on care, it's right on the hip and a strong sip is my therapist Got post traumatic stress disorder but I'm unaware of this I normalize the normal lies comin' from my professor emeritus My OG was like a terrorist, heretic Teachin' me good and bad You know the hood is sad When the killers playin' the role that your dad shoulda had (Dad) If he was here, maybe my pants wouldn't sag Maybe I'd learn how to smile instead of lookin' mad (You know) Runnin' from the law everywhere To plush views with first class seats From no views to you choose You never thought this would be Didn't wanna be a victim no more (So I decided that I) I just knew I wanted more So I didn't lose my- [YEBBA] I, I I, I I, I 'Bout to lose my-
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