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Winking Your Blues Away
by
Ivor Biggun
Featuring(s) : The Red-nosed Burglars
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Lyrics
All those lonely blues songs, you might feel that you wrote 'em You might be sad and think that life has kicked you in the scrotum Be brave and wipe that teardrop from your eye There's one more remedy you can try Wanking your blues away Wanking your blues away If you haven't had a promise And you haven't got a sister or a wife And your brother's not keen You can get to the promised land The answer's right there in your hand Try wanking to the rhythm of life It's a source of some amusement That thе craft of self-abusement Was invеnted, so it's thought By the Greeks and the Westphalians Perfected by Australians Developed by the Welsh into a competitive sport Wanking your blues away Wanking your blues away Shirt on the floor One hand and a metronome And lots of boogie-woogie The Cowman sits there on his farm With loads of blisters on his arm Wanking 'til the cows come home It's time to take your trousers down Lock the door and go to town You can wipe away your frown and wank your blues away Don't worry that you'll lose your sight Make the world seem gay and bright Wankers of the world unite and wank your blues away Wanking your blues away Wanking your blues away It's a harmless hobby, it's what your right arm's for And not for drinking lager The basic kit for masturbation Is a plinker and a hand and imagination Keep wanking 'til you just can't wank no more But don't forget to close the bathroom door
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