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Bad Friend
by
Crypt (Rap)
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2:30 in the morning and I get a text from my friend She said, "I need you right now" and I already knew what that meant See, me and this girl, we think alike, too many phone calls spent For me to know she's thinking 'bout her life and how it's gon' end See, on the outside, we're happy, and we show it to the world And we put on this fake exterior so the truth won't unfurl But I know who she is, 'cause it's like lookin' in a mirror All these smiles and cries for help and it couldn't be any clearer So I pick up the phone and call hеr as she answers through her criеs She's hyperventilating, telling me that she wants to die My heart starts to race and my thoughts begin to blur We're nine hours apart, but I'm seconds from losing her I tried to calm her down and tell her what she means to me Even though we're new friends, she's seen a side that no one sees Told her, "Listen to my breaths, I'm right here, please breathe" "You've got so much left to do, stay here, don't leave" The cries got even louder as the breaths got short I told her, "Listen to my words" as I fell down to the floor "Stay with me, I'm here, let it out, it's okay" Just cry till you can't cry no more tears down your face A couple minutes went by and the cryin' finally stopped But not because she did, because the phone call dropped I called her back quick, just hoping I'd hear "Hello" But I just kept getting met with the sounds of those dial tones I froze- what do you do in that moment? Do you call the police or do you hope that she's over it? Get a hold of her parents and tell 'em the situation Just so they can pull her from college and end her aspirations? Leave it alone and hope it was just an escapade? Pray for a text from her in the morning saying that she's okay? Call anyone you know just to make sure that she's alive? Ignore it completely and pray to God that she survives? I let it go- she must've wanted to be alone I guess that this was just another one of her episodes She never told no one about this depression she dealt with And who was I to air out her secrets? That would be selfish So I laid down in my bed and I rested my head Closed my eyes and drifted peacefully to sleep, then I dreamt That I would see her tomorrow and I would speak to her then Till I was woken to several several missed calls and texts that she's dead My heart broke- she downed a bottle of pills She took 'em shortly after our call ended, and it felt surreal She was a friend of many, a student-athlete at our school A daughter, a sister, a very special jewel At the funeral, they told us that nobody had a clue That they could've saved her life, if only that they knew And if someone at the funeral had ever felt depressed To get some help so that your face won't ever end up in the press There wasn't a dry face in the room- only twenty-two years old An entire life in front of her, and now she's laying there cold If only I had called someone, we wouldn't be here now And nobody would be sad, I wouldn't feel like I let her down But that's not what happened, 'cause instead of going to bed I called every person I knew to check to make sure you weren't dead I stayed up seven hours, prayin' every second of it Just hopin' to get a text sayin' that you weren't heaven-sent But then I got it- you told me that I had no right And blocked me on everything, and we ain't talked since that night Was I a bad friend? Options, I had none I guess I'd rather be a bad friend than a sad one *noises of a shovel digging into the ground*
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