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Tiny Man
by
Aunty Donna
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Hello there I wonder, have you ever asked yourself "Hmm, what goes on underneath my cupboard? Is there a tiny man that lives under there?" Well, why don't we ask? Tiny little man Titchy, tiny, little man His best friend's made of buttons And his bed's a slice of ham When you drop a rubber band Well he begins to shine With the help of some toothpicks He'll make a washing line His table is made of buttons, held together with some gum And his pillow is an olive that he puts inside his tum For bread, he'll eat your breakfast crumbs That have fallen on the floor For jam he'll use a tiny jar of jam He bought from the tiny store Because there is a tiny store, where he can buy normal things that are small But for some reason sometimes he'll make things from stuff you drop on the floor Hey tiny man, get out of my butter When in you're in there, you're utter butter clutter When I'm making toast, for my breakfast I don't want you in there, making a mess If your butter's done, just ask for some But son, that's not an open invitation If you'd like some butter, ask me each and every time Maintain a healthy dialogue would be just fine He works as a tiny broker Trading regular Wall Street stock But talking on a normal sized phone Can be rather c*cked So he went to the tiny store And bought a Bluetooth headset But then the market dropped, point zero one percent Now, point zero one percent, might not seem like much to you But because he is very small, to him it's rather huge To him, point zero one percent, is a million percent So he tied a noose with a hair tie That was pink and fluorescent Tiny little man Very very very small tiny man Be careful what you drop, he might use it to kill himself He loves to chat to his best friend They sing and dance and play all day His best friend loves to- WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS HAPPENING? WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS HAPPENING, AYE?
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