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Brass-Mounted Army
by
Anonymous
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Lyrics
Oh soldiers, I’ve concluded to make a little song And if I tell no falsehood there can be nothing wrong If any be offended at what I have to sing Then surely his own conscience applies the bitter sting Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule Whisky is a monster, and ruins great and small But in our noble Army, Headquarters gets it all They drink it when there’s danger, although it seems too hard But if a private touches it, they put him under guard Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule The Army’s now much richer than when the war begun It furnishes three tables where once it had but one The first is richly loaded with chickens, goose, and duck The rest with pork and mutton, the third with good old buck Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule Our generals eat the poultry, and buy it very cheap Our colonels and our majors devour the hog and sheep The privates are contented, except when they can steal With beef and corn bread plenty to make a hearty meal Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule Sometimes we get so hungry that we’re bound to press a pig Then the largest stump in Dixie we’re sure to have to dig And when we fret, an officer who wears long-legged boots With neither judge nor jury, puts us on double roots Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule These things, and many others, are truly hard to me But still I’ll be contented, and fight for Liberty And when the war is over, oh what a jolly time We’ll be our own commanders and sing much sweeter rhymes Oh, how do you like the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule We’ll see our loving sweethearts, and sometimes kiss them, too We’ll eat the finest rations, and bid old buck adieu There’ll be no generals with orders to compel Long boots and eagle b***ons, forever fare ye well And thus we’ll leave the Army The bra**-mounted Army The high-falutin’ Army Where eagle b***ons rule
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