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Rock Bottom
by
AK
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Feel like I'm at rock bottom, not a dollar in my pocket Every time I feel okay, I just point me to all my problems Why the f**k can't I just stop it? It's so f**king toxic How can I wanna be okay so badly and still make no progress (Make no progress) And some days are worse than others, I admit (Rock bottom) I'm there for you, of course, but I'm who I forget (Rock bottom) I never show up for myself, it might seem like I'm doing well But you dodge me if I ever let you in (Rock bottom) Put my life in God's hands and pray to Him that he don't drop it At this point, I feel so heartless, blame the life I'm stuck in, f**k this No one ever would survive if my road was what they walk in Why thе f**k would I tell someone? Lеt my problems be my problems That's my issue from the jump, I never talk about sh*t Throughout my life, I never thought that anybody'd understand Then I picked the microphone up and I got it off my chest And found so many people fighting demons too, now I'm with them It's us against the world Now I know what this 'bout 'cause I know how it be When the lights go down and the thoughts come out Feel like no way out and you just can't breathe Tryna get calmed down, but your eyes bawl out 'Til you feel like you're drowning in all of your tears 'Til you fall asleep, then you wake from dreams Then you feel like sh*t 'cause it's make-believe And then it's f**k it, I'm done, I'm going back to sleep Don't wake me up if you see the sun, that's my biggest enemy Give me time, I'll figure it out No, really, I'm fine, don't think I need any help Just let me rot 'cause it ain't like I— (F**k) Feel like I'm at rock bottom, not a dollar in my pocket Every time I feel okay, I just point me to all my problems Why the f**k can't I just stop it? It's so f**king toxic How can I wanna be okay so badly and still make no progress (Make no progress) And some days are worse than others, I admit (Rock bottom) I'm there for you, of course, but I'm who I forget (Rock bottom) I never show up for myself, it might seem like I'm doing well But you dodge me if I ever let you in (Rock bottom) What's it like getting out of bed? Rubbing the crust out of your eyes and feeling refreshed? Last night, I went to bed around 7 p.m. Woke up at noon feeling tired, mad it happened again I woke up Goddamn it, now I gotta get up acting like I'm fine Let my face show motivation while this hell invades my mind Embrace the struggles, that's what makes you, but what happens when you try And they become the closest thing to your existence? Sick of trying What's the point if it's a cycle that I know all too well? Maybe the fact it's consistent gives me comfort and it's hell I made friends with the monsters even though I hate how it feels They're all I've known for so long, it makes it so hard to rebel But if I keep believing, maybe one day something will change I only try 'cause dying means my name will carry that shame I have a family that loves me even if I can't say the same about myself So time will tell if I get out, I— Feel like I'm at rock bottom, not a dollar in my pocket Every time I feel okay, I just point me to all my problems Why the f**k can't I just stop it? It's so f**king toxic How can I wanna be okay so badly and still make no progress (Make no progress) And some days are worse than others, I admit (Rock bottom) I'm there for you, of course, but I'm who I forget (Rock bottom) I never show up for myself, it might seem like I'm doing well But you dodge me if I ever let you in (Rock bottom)
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